Tuesday, October 1, 2013

The Rant of an Adopting Mama

No, this is not my typical rant.  I'm NOT going to go on and on about how we've been waiting forever OR about how I'm wondering if our caseworkers tremble, scream, and roll their eyes when they see yet another email from "that crazy Holland lady" (my words, I'm so sure it's not theirs. No, of course not. It's all in my head).  No, today is a different rant. Grab some popcorn, some Rasinets, and a drink...
Did you know that there are OVER 120,000 kids in foster care RIGHT NOW who are legally free for adoption? Did you know that there are many, many more Christian families in the U.S. right now? Each of those families could answer the call to be " a father to the fatherless" and end those numbers. While I know not everyone is called to open their home to a non biological child I find the numbers interesting.
What I find horrifying is that in the process of our adoption search I've seen MULTIPLE sibling groups get split up because people are not willing to adopt multiple children, a sibling with medical/emotional/educational needs, or possibly the older siblings of a group. I keep seeing it over and over.  It just breaks my heart.  Half the time I've noticed that siblings not only get spread out over different parts of a state but in different states altogether!! Again, my heart aches.
I can't even imagine how many times we've been looked over because we don't make enough money or we have a small house. SO?  We'd love them to pieces, fight for their education, plant seeds of faith, surround them with family and church family who would spoil them to death in a great way.
Today, I was looking on the photolistings and saw yet another group we had looked at being split up.  Four kids now destined to go to four different homes. Seriously?
I've been re-reading Tony Merida and Rick Morton's "Orphanology", a wonderful book that's not only GREAT theology about how we should answer the call to help in orphan care because we too are adopted--but also has heartwarming stories and paths to get started in  various forms of orphanolgy. Wonderful book. Add it to your Amazon wish list. ;)
 Merida and Morton talk about various ways that families can assist in orphan care beyond bringing a child in the home--one of which is assisting an adopting family--financially, babysitting, bringing by meals, helping with laundry, yard work...you get the idea.  While I'm not dreaming of 19 kids and counting, I know that we have many people in our lives that would be more than willing to help us in various ways if we were able to adopt a large sibling groups or even more than one sibling group. Adopt us kids recently sent us the link to a success story of adoption where two dads have been able to grow their family through adoption--up to 14 kids ( http://www.today.com/news/superdads-couple-adopts-14-kids-foster-care-4B11187918 )  I'm happy that these kids get to stay together and at the same time it upsets me because we keep getting emails saying that they're sorry but they do not allow more than five or six in a home. Or that we were not chosen because we do not have enough rooms to let each child have their own room. (I have a house, not a hotel....j/s)  I'm sorry but sometimes you have to let go of numbers and think about what's best for the kids. I would imagine that keeping siblings together should trump going over your number by a kid or two.   (Before you answer my rant with your own...yes, I am aware that some families get foster kids for the check.  We're not one of them so let me have my Mama soapbox for a minute!  And again, yes, getting more kids than you can provide for is not good either. Not like we're asking for welfare from our government...which I guess wouldn't be that hard...anyone want a free cell phone??????)

So, back to my original thought...splitting up siblings= No Bueno!!  Helping families who are adopting in some form or fashion = Fantastico!   Any questions?

Oh, and if you know of anyone wanting a small home in the middle of Tupelo, send them our way.  We're apparently going to have to upgrade. I'm considering buying 12-15 shipping containers, hot gluing them together, adding a little modge podge and some glitter....I'm sure Pinterest will give me some ideas.  It's that or find a coupon for 50% off one home!!  Let me know if you see any of those just lying around....

As always, we value your prayers.  I apparently need some for sanity...
We're still waiting. Seeking a flashlight to see what the path has for us. "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.  For as they heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts."  Isaiah 55: 8-9


  1. Kate, what a great post. I've been praying for your family since we caught up at the mall several months back. Great rant! I'll pray that the agencies will put away numbers, and that your family will soon be blessed with more beautiful children. We love you guys and miss you.

  2. Thank you so much for your prayers! I really miss having you in Tupelo. I cannot believe how quickly your girls are growing. Praying for your beautiful family as well. Love you!